Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
i think i just lost a toe
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
