90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
