was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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