Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
