Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
