At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
