now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Randomize
