i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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