Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
We have started to decorate penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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