New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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