You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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