people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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