Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.