I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
