I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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