i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
