ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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