I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
