dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
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