I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize