Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
