I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
