even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
