Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
