doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
