absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
