Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
