i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
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