I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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