yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Randomize
