Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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