were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home