I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
only if we run a train.
done.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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