the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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