Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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