I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize