he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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