That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
