I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COCAINE IS GR8
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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