yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
