a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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