your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
She bit a glass in half.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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