My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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