everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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