I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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