evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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