my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
