You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
