We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
