Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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