I look better un-naked...
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
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The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
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Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us