I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
